Days 3 & 4

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I spent the last two days “living on the fly.”

And I survived.

And I’m proud of the choices I was able to make.

And I didn’t starve to death.

And I’m pretty sure the world will continue to produce things like brownies, Dr. Pepper, and gravy…

I spent Friday night and Saturday attended Married 4 Life with Dan Seaborn. It. Was. Awesome! And I highly recommend going to hear him speak if you get a chance.

But the good news is.

I wasn’t the only one who took my own bottle of water.

Or baggie of snacks.

Or that didn’t eat mints from the bowl.

And you know what, it. Was. OK!

I felt extremely empowered after “making it through.”

Which is awesome.

In the last two days, I forgot my packed lunch and snacks for work.

And still made wise choices.

Went to lunch with friends.

And still made wise choices.

Went to a conference for two days.

And still made wise choices
.

With HIS help, it CAN be done.

Today, my husband set up something on my in-laws tv to scroll photos.

Photos from the past.

Ugh.

There I was. Big smile. Cute little black top and khakis… Followed by a pic of me from last summer.

Ugh.

Completely defeated.

I got up and went to the kitchen to do what else but eat my feelings.

I proceeded to open every cabinet.

And then I stopped.

I am more than this
.

That might be who I was… Or is.

But God is changing me. Right now. Even as I type.

And that’s the best news ever!

I may not be who I am supposed to be (yet), but thank God I’m not who I was!

Change my heart Oh Lord!!!

Strong Enough

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SheReadsTruth is hosting Friday Devotionals during Lent. Check out their website to be a part of this amazing teaching experience!

Today’s Scripture: Psalm 130

“Out of the depths I cry to you, O’ Lord! O’ Lord, hear my voice! Let your ears be attentive to the voice of my plea for mercy!” vs 1 & 2

When I first read this passage, My mind immediately jumped to the time right after I had my daughter.

Things didn’t go as I had planned. Seriously, I had a typed birth plan. And I ended up spending two weeks in the hospital… too weak to hold my new beautiful baby girl. Too weak to do much of anything by myself.

I could no longer rely on myself.

I had to fully rely on others… my family, my nurses, my doctor… my God.

About that time Matthew West’s song, Strong Enough came out. And while I had only heard it a couple of times, I knew the tune, and I could remember the words, “I know I’m not strong enough to be everything that I’m supposed to be…” 

It was enough to keep me going during those two weeks.

Fast forward to the present.

I became a Christian when I was just 8 years old. And from time to time, I have doubted my faith.

But at 33, I finally realize my doubt comes from within… Comes from me trying to do it on my own.

For the first time in my life, I fully understand “Trust in the Lord with ALL (not just the part you want to give up) our heart, and do not lean on YOUR OWN understanding. In all ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV)

I am so thankful that I serve a God who is strong enough.

Lent came at a really good time in my life this year.

Not because things were going perfectly… quite the opposite really.

But because things are finally lining out in my life.

Not on my own strength by any means… but in His. Because I finally gave up trying to do it on my own.

Over the next 38 days, I encourage you to do something to strengthen your relationship with Him.

To read what other’s have to say about Psalm 130, check out SheReadsTruth today!

Day 2

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Today was a little harder, but not.

My food was spot on. At work I ate my packed/planned foods. The thing I didn’t anticipate was the break room water supply to taste terrible and the snack bar to close early.

So I was down on my water until I got home.

Home.

Nobody was there when I got home and I was starving!!

I thought I packed enough.

Today was different though. I got full faster, but I was famished every two hours.

I was able to whiz by my husbands Oreos and grab some almonds and a little turkey.

I kept replaying an earlier conversation in my head.

I have two really great friends who are keeping me grounded and supporting me like crazy.

When I was all like, I miss cheese. They were like, but yeah, it’s just cheese. To which I giggled.

It is just cheese.

It’s just chocolate.

It’s just a roll with butter.

It’s just…

The thing keeping me from a closer walk with God.

The devotion I read on She Reads Truth put it best this way:

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It’s 40 days. And I’m sure they won’t quit making cheese or chocolate or rolls and butter in the next 40 days.

Aside from all that.

I’ve really been digging deeper in the word. The significance of Lent has a whole new meaning this year.

Things are being revealed that I never would have imagined.

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And I look forward to the things that I’ve gotten just a glimpse of, to be fully revealed.

Today’s food-
1 24 oz of water
1 24 oz of unsweetened tea
1 32 oz bottle of water

Breakfast- chocolate Shakeology with almond milk and peanut butter

Lunch- same as yesterday

Snack 1- fruit

Snack 2- turkey and almonds

Dinner- vanilla Shakeology with fruit

Day 1

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Back in December, I bought this book. You know one that promises you can change your life from the inside out in just 40 days.

I had seen Rick Warren on Dr. Oz earlier in the week talk about something called, The Daniel Plan.Always eager to learn, on a three hour bus trip, I bought it. I mean, if Dr. Oz was for it and all…

I read a few chapters that day.

And didn’t pick up the book again until January.

I was intrigued by what Rick Warren had to say… What the Bible had to say.

Again I put it down. I’ll start again Monday is what I would tell myself. You know because all good diets start on Mondays.

But this isn’t a diet. It truly isn’t.

I’m not looking to lose tons of weight. While that would be wonderful, I’m truly seeking out healing. Healing from the inside out of the broken mess of a woman that I currently am.

I’ve been talking to someone. Someone who will help me make positive changes in my life that in my 33 years have been able to do.

So, as I work through my past in my present for my future, things have been revealed to me in God’s perfect time.

And one of those things is to follow The Daniel Plan. And how perfect that today is the beginning of Lent.

And while I’m not practicing a religion that “gives something up” for Lent, I am a Christian and using this time to truly reflect on God’s perfect will for my life.

And something that has always been an “idol” in my life is food. I planned my days around my meals. I couldn’t go without for fear I wouldn’t get any. The thought of skipping dessert is unheard of…

I am here to say, with whitening strips in my mouth (because you can’t eat with clean teeth)… I have successfully made it through Day 1.

Not on my own strength by any means, but from the help of my God. And I truly believe that.

Today’s Food:
3 24 oz glasses of water
2 20 oz glasses of unsweetened tea

Breakfast – Shakeology made with almond milk and a handful of berries

Lunch – turkey burger with grilled onions, peppers, on a bed of spinach, topped with Avacado

Snack – turkey and almonds

Dinner – fresh off my parents farm cubed steak and a potato

Dessert – fresh fruit

*Im not for sure about the potato, but I’ll double check

Follow me for the next 40 days as I surrender myself fully to be transformed into the amazing woman god has designed me to be.